Top Secrets — Martha Freeman

She keeps Cadbury roasted almond bars in the drawer of her bedside table at all times.
She sings along with the radio even when she doesn't know the words.
She does not eat meat at home, but if you invite her to your house and serve meat, she will eat enough to be polite.
The TV set in her living room does not work. She found it on Garner Street, where it was waiting for the trash guys. Her family does not have cable or broadcast TV, but they do watch DVDs and videos.
When Martha's kids were little, she told them to eat the crusts on their sandwiches or they would grow up to be yellow-belly-lily-livered sapsuckers. Eating crusts apparently works because none of them did.
She was the slowest runner in her third-grade class. Also fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh....
Owing to a congenital flaw, she is incapable of matching socks. This wicker hamper in the corner of her room is filled with unmatched socks.
She was fired from her job in the Woodrow Wilson Junior High School cafeteria because she could not add up the prices fast enough.
She not only cries at funerals and weddings, she cries at movies, graduation ceremonies, magazine articles and (especially) the Academy Awards.
When she wears a ballcap, it's because her hair is so messy it's embarrassing. Her favorite one was a gift from the students at Keith Junior High School in Altoona, Pennsylvania.

Cadbury: No product placement dollars changed hands. But if you represent Cadbury, Martha is willing to talk.

Yellow-belly-lily-livered sapsucker: What you grow up to be if you don't eat breadcrusts.

Martha Freeman's Top Ten Secrets